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THE SHITHAWKS KEEP IT CLASSY!

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Classy Drunk #11

 

Drunkards. Libertines. Drug enthusiasts. Storytellers. Brawlers ‘n Bawlers. Satiristas. Tattoo’d Scum! Ah, men after mine own heart!

Troy Stark, once known as a straight edge, and now about as straight edge as a Nepalese mountain pass. He’s a certifiable cigarette smokin’, pint guzzlin’, raconteurin’ sonuvabitch. And God (if there were such a person) love him for it!

As for Blayne Smith – well, after about a minute on stage, you’ll see what this denim-soaked skinny jeans’d shit kickin’ so & so is all about. He’ll tell you everything you need to know on that mic, and you’ll eat it the fuck up damn you! He likes his food served vegan and his drugs made for peakin’

O what a fine pair they make!

And 2014 is off to a glimmery start for this terrible twosome! Their Toronto cult hit web series THE SHITHAWKS is about to start shooting season 2 (featuring a radio cameo by your favorite comedy editor). Blayne’s own ichannel No Kidding special is hitting the air. And Troy is writing away with the mad fervor of – well, a sharp young comic on the fast rise. Which is what these dudes are

But, we’ve gone and saved the best for last! Troy ‘n Blayne – actually, fuck it, let’s go ahead and TMZ it up a piece. Let’s call these boys TROYNE!

TROYNE’s monthly standup showcase “CLASSY DRUNK” returns to the Emmett Ray for their first show of 2014! And let me tell you something, chief – this lineup is more stacked than… uh… uh… Fuck me, I dunno. A double order at a Topeka I.H.O.P?? #diabetes #America #freedom

Fun facts about the Emmett Ray – (A) its named after Sean Penn’s character in 1999’s tragically overlooked mock-biopic Sweet & Lowdown (yes, it was directed by Woody Allen. No, I don’t want to open that can of worms right now. That’s a whole other discussion for a whole other forum)  (B) I’d often duck into the Emmett Ray for a pint while I waited to go on at a much loved pot show a few doors down. I still love you, pot room!

But, I digress. Ladies & gentlemen, the show!

 

Cleve Jones (@CleveJones)

Producer “CAMPFIRE COMEDY”

 

Alex Wood (@WoodComedy)

YUK YUKS, Just for Laughs, Sirius XM

 

Rhiannon Archer (@RhiannonArcher)

2013 CCA Nominee, NXNE, Dark Comedy Festival

 

Hunter Collins (@Hunter_Collins)

MUCH MUSIC, Cottage Country Comedy Fest, Toronto & Montreal Sketchfests

 

Rebecca Reeds (@RebeccaReeds)

One of *Ottawa’s funniest crowd killers! Here to give us a taste on the Toronto stage

 

*And by the way, anyone who says Ottawa is boring is an idiot and can go DO themselves in the sex parts with a dirty burritos fork! You’re wrong, I’m right. Send your hate to @ComicDeanYoung and funk you very much!

 

And, the man of the month – Classy Drunk’s special guest headliner (*just for February, there’s a different one every time but let’s focus on this one first)

 

RYAN HORWOOD!

You’ve seen him ripping up stages all over the city, including Yuk Yuks’ own flagship super club (Not to be confused with a supper club, those are for old people with checkered support socks and adult Depends)

Fun Horwood fact! He was on the inaugural episode of my “Forever Young” podcast! We talked about Rob Ford when the shit hadn’t even hit the fan. Back when it wasn’t yet hack to talk about Rob Ford. Yeah, that’s a bit shameless of me. Let us continue

You might also recognize Ryan more recently as the host of the smash YTV show “Cache Craze”. Of course, on stage, in a classy bar like the Emmett Ray, surrounded by a list of comics like this, and inspired by the Night Magic and the likes of TROYNE – well, Ryan tends to get a little more raunchy than you might have seen on the old boob tube. He’ll bring the sex & danger, alright

But hey, why take my word for it?

A lineup like this should cost plenty of $$. Instead, it costs you nothing! NOTHING!

Well, whatever you wanna spend on tilting pints down the old gullet, and believe me it is encouraged

 

“CLASSY DRUNK #11”

THE EMMETT RAY

924 COLLEGE STREET

Tues. Feb 4, 8pm 

 

Classy Drunk 2


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